The “I Told You I Was Sick” Tombstone Gag. That Shit Just Never Gets Old. A Halloween Hypochondria Post.

tombstone

Will someone please explain to me how a person’s literal death is evidence that they weren’t actually sick at the time they died or ever?  The “I Told You I Was Sick” tombstone may (or may not idk) have been around as long as tombstones themselves have been around and it is even cataloged in a collection of “curious epitaphs” as the epitaph of an ancient hypochondriac.

The epitaph.  Of a hypochondriac.  Hmm.  While I process that very concept a moment, I Google “hypochondria” and find that the word doesn’t mean exactly what I thought it meant.  Or rather, the origin of the word itself was nothing like I had assumed.  Apparently, the very concept of unverified/unverifiable illness causing patients extreme physical and mental distress originated from complaints involving the abdomen.  Why doesn’t that surprise me at all.  From Wiki:

Among the regions of the abdomen, the hypochondrium is the uppermost part.  The word derives from the Greek term ὑποχόνδριος hypokhondrios, meaning “of the soft parts between the ribs and navel” from ὑπό hypo (“under”) and χόνδρος khondros, or cartilage (of the sternum).

Hypochondria in Late Latin meant “the abdomen”. 

The term hypochondriasis for a state of disease without real cause reflected the ancient belief that the viscera of the hypochondria were the seat of melancholy and sources of the vapor that caused morbid feelings.  Until the early 18th century, the term referred to a “physical disease caused by imbalances in the region that was below your rib cage”.  Robert Burton’s The Anatomy of Melancholy (1621) blamed it “for everything from ‘too much spittle’ to ‘rumbling in the guts’.

Bolds mine.  Apparently, people have been presenting to doctors for a long, long time complaining of upper abdominal pain, too much spittle chronic nausea and/or drooling, and rumbling in the guts the dreaded intestinal gurgling that often foretells an impending Crohn’s flare and they had morbid feelings about that.  You don’t say.

I should mention here that capsule endoscopy, which is currently the only way to get diagnostic imaging of the lining of the small bowel, is a very new technology that’s extremely expensive and often not covered by insurance.  Before modern imaging technology, including capsule endoscopy technology, diseases of the upper part of the abdomen in particular were virtually undiagnosable.  Due to its inaccessible location, in practice, even today, for many if not most people getting a reliable diagnostic image of the hypochondrium (!) or the upper part of the abdomen and gastrointestinal tract is impossible.

Continue reading “The “I Told You I Was Sick” Tombstone Gag. That Shit Just Never Gets Old. A Halloween Hypochondria Post.”

Moron The Feminist Psy-Op. Women Really Are Mentally and Physically Ill. We’ve Been Bred For It for 10,000 Years.

I wrote in this space before about what I am calling the Feminist Psy-Op where American women have been bamboozled via feminism to activate against our own interests where we traded our natural dominion over food, water, and plant-based medicine — the literal necessities of life — for the promise (a mere promise!) of increased consumerist power to buy those things from men.  Although it was too late by then to save ourselves anyway where male-made nuclear contamination and other industrial pollution had already permanently poisoned our land including the soil, air, water and biomass (read: food, pets and ourselves) in the second half of the 20th century American feminists agreed to voluntarily and forever give up any claim we may’ve had over the only things that really mattered and we and everyone and every living thing on the planet have only suffered since.  Because as they say, if you don’t have your health you don’t have anything.

As a general matter, and to the extent it is dependent on a healthy physical environment, our health had already been taken from us but we agreed, essentially, to not complain about it and to give it all over to Big Brother — to Let Go and Let God (where God is men and patriarchy).  This sickening trade-off — female power over food, water and the necessities of life in exchange for a male promise — was and is what is known as American feminism.  As the timeline suggests, we were already in serious trouble by the time any American woman got the vote where toxic industrial pollution was already a serious problem by the early 1900s; likewise, by the time the 1960s rolled around (the 60s being the start of American radical feminism when female anti-war activists broke away from misogynistic male anti-war politicking) male-made nuclear pollution had been circulating in our air, water and biomass for some 20 years and was only getting both more common and more extreme.  I can only conclude that women’s agreement to hand over power to men was symbolic by that point and was only ever intended to thought-terminate and shut us up forever about the so-called and strategically denigrated “matters of the home” including the completely predictable effects of male-made pollution on our health and lives.

We already weren’t healthy though if we are honest about it, where women have been bred via rape and other male (not female) sexual selection for 10,000 years — that’s 500 generations — to be concubines, broodmares and cannon fodder for patriarchal men.  And that, I think, must be the context in which an honest discussion of women’s health takes place: the context of a 10,000-year more or less global patriarchy and thus, 10,000 years of the literal genetic modification of females by males where women have been bred to serve men and male interests.  In short, mentally and physically weak enough to put up with men and maleness despite everything males do and everything males are.

Continue reading “Moron The Feminist Psy-Op. Women Really Are Mentally and Physically Ill. We’ve Been Bred For It for 10,000 Years.”

Anxiety = Trying to Keep Things Alive in a Necrophilic Culture. Depression = Knowing That’s Actually Impossible + Being Gaslighted About that Fact. PS. Everything Dies.

What is anxiety?  What is depression?  Why are females in particular often anxious and depressed?  Why are the chronically ill?  Why are the chronically poor?  Why are new mothers?  I hardly think this even merits its own post but I did want to toss it out there because we are clearly being lied to so consistently and so overwhelmingly about the source(s) of our mental, emotional and psychic suffering.  Hint: it’s not an individual problem where some 1/6 of modern Americans — that’s one in six — are taking psychiatric drugs, mostly antidepressants, and mostly taking them long-term.

Here, I would add our intellectual suffering to that list, where particularly women are tasked with keeping things alive under capitalism and patriarchy, including kids, partners, elderly parents, pets, plants, and ourselves, but where literally every facet of our necrophilic culture is stacked against us successfully doing that and where even under the best of circumstances, everything “living” eventually dies.  Thinking beings would tend to react negatively to being gaslit about that or anything — in this case, that it is possible to stop death even under the most biophilic circumstances and capitalism and patriarchy are hardly biophilic.  Do you see where I’m going with this?  This might be a short post.

It seems that some people, perhaps women in particular, are intelligent, thinking beings who may therefore be particularly prone to experiencing crippling cognitive dissonance when we are essentially being asked to believe 2 or more contradictory things at the same time.  In the case of women’s sex (not gender) role under capitalism and patriarchy women are literally tasked with stopping death.  Anxiety much?  We are tasked with keeping things alive but are not granted easy (or any) access to clean (or any) food, water, air, or to shelter, sunlight, exercise, healing medicine, or to the peace we need to make that actually possible but what we are told about any of this does not match the reality of it.  Cognitive dissonance much?  So is so-called depression actually crippling cognitive dissonance?  I’m starting to think it is and that the reason more men don’t suffer from depression is that men aren’t that smart in the first place, where crippling cognitive dissonance would seem to be reserved for frankly the cognitive (and crippling O-pression is reserved for the oppressed).

Query: if so-called depression is actually crippling cognitive dissonance, and I think it probably is, why is it treated (or even treatable) with drugs?  Discuss.

Cheryl Went the Other Way. On The Path Not Taken.

Recently I met Cheryl, a member of my adopted community here in the Middle of Nowhere, Cannabis Central, USA.  Cheryl is a bit older than I am, used to be a writer of religious texts.  Even had one published before self-publishing was a thing.  A bona fide published writer.  Writers are a weird bunch (obviously) and Cheryl is certainly weird, and was probably a bit (way) off even before she got sick — like me, Cheryl is seriously chronically ill.  I haven’t asked about her diagnoses but like many chronically ill people and especially chronically ill women, she likely has more than one illness, and it is likely that at least one of her afflictions is an autoimmune disease.  As I am learning, these illnesses, for whatever reason, tend to travel in packs.  I personally only have one that I know of — Crohn’s disease — but since moving residences 2 weeks ago and finding myself unable to get out of bed much and wracked with head-to-toe pain and crippling fatigue ever since, I am once again wondering if I have another one although I have learned through reading other Crohn’s patients’ testimonies online that Crohn’s all by itself is enough to render anyone the barely-walking dead and that is indeed how I feel.  Cheryl, on the other hand, has been buried under her particular prison for years.

Continue reading “Cheryl Went the Other Way. On The Path Not Taken.”

Swallowing “Professional Middle Class” Hook, Line & Sinker. Academic Tenure Can Be Revoked Due to Illness (and Other Reasons).

This is Ruby.  Ruby is a mommy vlogger with over a million subscribers, is the sister of Bonnie and Ellie, and like her sisters is also a generational member of the LDS religious cult (Latter Day Saints, aka Mormons).  Ruby has a family including 6 young children and a husband.  Ruby and her husband have spent their entire relationship getting Mr. Ruby educated with a Master’s and a Ph.D and Mr. Ruby has used his education to get a teaching job which he has held for the last several years.  Mr. Ruby just found out he got tenure which means he can never be fired* from his job.  According to Ruby’s understanding of the situation, this means that they will always have money and therefore that they will always have security.  That they will always have necessary and discretionary income.  That they will always have a home.  Ruby is so, so, so very happy about that.

Judging by her life and lifestyle as a married middle class woman with children, Ruby has clearly bought into one myth, the myth of the middle class mother and wife who thinks that having a successful husband is a guarantee of current and future security.  She assumes that he will never leave, or decide to spend his money recklessly or on other people or in ways of which Ruby herself does not approve.  It is possible that their shared religion and community as LDS may function as a social glue that holds this couple together and keeps Mr. Ruby’s money in the shared account (and his dick in his pants) so it’s possible that Ruby is a bit smarter than most women who do the same thing but who don’t have anything holding their marriage together besides “attraction” or “love” or shared interests or shared parenting or other such fleeting things.  And to be fair, Ruby might be right about Mr. Ruby and Mr. Ruby might be the greatest guy or even the greatest person in the entire world and their plan to be secure for the rest of their life based on his job might be reasonable under certain circumstances.

But how realistic is it really, when the future security they have both worked so hard for is completely dependent on Mr. Ruby’s physical and mental ability to work, especially now where we are experiencing the collapse of our ecosystem and where so many people are becoming seriously chronically ill?  What if Mr. Ruby already has a latent condition of which he is not yet aware including the increasing likelihood that any of us has a confounding autoimmune disease that will be resistant to treatment, both incurable and progressive, and where the conventional treatments are known to make autoimmune patients worse and even more disabled than they were before?

*Tenure can be revoked y’all.  And not just because of disability either.

Continue reading “Swallowing “Professional Middle Class” Hook, Line & Sinker. Academic Tenure Can Be Revoked Due to Illness (and Other Reasons).”

Rubber Tramping with Cornelius Vango. Injury vs. Illness?

I have been completely fascinated with this woman who calls herself Cornelius Vango.  She is an anarchist librarian, squatter, community-builder, van dweller, adventurer and a skilled vidder, vlogger and editor and an above-the-knee amputee having apparently lost a leg in an accident as a young teenager.  For the past 3.5 years, she has lived in an off-grid squatter community called Slab City in the California desert and routinely manages extreme conditions including heat that exceeds 120F degrees in the summertime.  She also regularly bathes in, washes her clothes in and collects drinking water from an agricultural canal that runs through the Slabs and has gained considerable weight since arriving there which looks to me like systemic inflammation and has been having noticeable negative reactions to food so has gone gluten-free.

Continue reading “Rubber Tramping with Cornelius Vango. Injury vs. Illness?”

Self-Sufficiency, Responsibility, Preparation, Independence and Other Nonstarters. Part III. The Punchline.

In Part I of this series, I described my history with an insane physically, emotionally and sexually abusive nuclear family that combined with our collective lack of resources made me realize that if the S ever HTF that I would be on my own with no one in my family either willing or able to help.  I decided that I needed to be “successful” in life if I had any hope of securing a safe, sane and comfortable future for myself free from abuse, including abuse from men which I knew by watching and listening to my mother’s experience could and would ruin my life.  In Part II I describe the execution of my plan — I applied and was accepted to law school and graduated at the top of my class, hopeful that a law degree would provide me with the employment skills and financial security I knew I needed to keep myself safe.  I worked my ass off for about 6 years chasing an elusive “savings” and financial safety net that would catch me if I ever needed catching.  In the end, the only substantial money I ever made as a practicing attorney were the legal settlements for two work-related injuries I had suffered on the job as a lawyer.  My career and my best-laid plans were largely a bust by the time I was laid off the final time, lost my apartment in a hurricane, and was diagnosed with a serious debilitating chronic illness, Crohn’s disease.

In this Part III I will dissect and analyze what happened to me as basically the punchline of a cosmic patriarchal and capitalist joke — modern girls and women are led to believe that educations and careers can and will save us from the oppressive lives our mothers and grandmothers led but this is easier said than done.  In reality, my experience and observation has led me to conclude that, under capitalism and patriarchy, women’s “success” or power largely refers to women’s increased spending power as “successful” consumers who make money for other people, where we first accrue an enormous student debt load and then both mandatory and so-called discretionary expenses increase faster than our incomes making the goal of achieving true financial security elusive at best.  Women are in fact prevented in every case from creating safe, sane and comfortable lives for ourselves, including the financial security to protect ourselves from the very worst of patriarchy and capitalism when things go sideways, whether we have careers, or children, or neither or both.  It really doesn’t appear to matter at all.

Continue reading “Self-Sufficiency, Responsibility, Preparation, Independence and Other Nonstarters. Part III. The Punchline.”